The The Force

The The Force

(The Divorce)


Dear Santa Claus,

My name is Tommy and I’m six years old.
I go to the first grade at Samuel Clemens Elementary School.

My teacher, Miss Leglier, telled our class to write a letter to you about what we want for Christmas. A big girl helped me write my letter. She is in the fourth grade, in Mr. Aides’ class. Her name is Sally and she wears glasses.

Santa, are you stronger than Jesus? I need to know because something is coming to our house and I’m afraid. Mommy and Pastor Groundwither told me that Jesus will always love me, but they said he won’t do what I want. I think it’s because I’ve been a bad boy. I pushed Cathy down at recess and made her skin her knee. I also took Miss Leglier’s scissors out of her desk and cut Anna Mulvaney’s hair off. (Me and my friends call her Animal Veiny, because she has red hair and lots of freckles, and she has white legs with blue lines in them.) Anna hit me real hard, and she made me cry too. So, then, I took Miss Leglier’s stapler and I put Anna’s hair back on her. It was crooked. Miss Leglier and Mommy found out.

Santa, Mommy spanked me already, so those things don’t count for you, jest for Jesus and Pastor Groundwither.

Last Friday,Santa Claus, when Daddy came home from work late, again, I sneaked out of bed and listened at the top of the stairs. Mommy and Daddy yelled at each other for a long time, again. And then, when I waked up the next day, Daddy wasn’t home. I asked my Mommy when my Daddy would be back. My Mommy said that my Daddy wouldn’t ever be back. She said the only thing that was coming to our house for Christmas is The The Force. I don’t know what The The Force is, but I think it’s like the scary parts of Star Wars.”

Please-please-please! Santa, can you take The The Force away for Christmas instead of bringing me presents?

Thank you, Santa; I know you can do anything.



                                                                           L D Welch

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